The Most Important Skill I’ve Learned In The Last 10 Years To Build My Business And Get Through Life

It’s so important, I don’t know how I used to survive without learning this skill…

Maybe there’s a reason that you saw and read this post, nevertheless, I want to share with you a very important skill that has helped me survive getting fired, starting a company, building a company, shutting down a company, firing people, dealing with emotional BS, and more.

I’ve dealt with a lot of lows (being depressed, etc) and I’ve had some high highs (finding love, running a great company, etc). And through it all, I believe this particular skill has gotten me through it.. it has helped me get through life. Not just to survive, but actually, thrive.

This skill is life-changing for me.

I really believe it is one of the most important things that anyone could learn in their lifetime. Most people know about it, it doesn’t require much to start, you can even get free instructions everywhere all over the interwebs. But most people never really try or start it.

So, I thought to myself, “Why don’t people want to try something that will turn their life around? Why don’t people want to be happier? Why don’t people want to be able to process, deal, and bounce back from tough times better?”. Perhaps, it’s too difficult to start by yourself. Perhaps, people don’t know where to go to learn it. Or perhaps, they don’t know who to talk to about this.

If you’re still wondering what is this secret skill I’ve been rambling about? What is this one habit that some of the most successful people swore by? Not just anyone.. but people like Ray Dalio, Steve Jobs, Arianna Huffington, and more.

Look, it’s not about the posture, or sitting down, chanting a bunch of mantras. The skill is actually about being present, in the here and now, completely experiencing life. Sounds simple. Even too simple. Too easy. But that’s probably why most of us won’t do it. We don’t appreciate simple and easy things.

“Why aren’t more people meditating?“

We have believed that it requires so much effort to be happy and successful. We have to struggle. A lot. Everything in life worth having requires so much hard work, right? All that pressure on ourselves! While it’s certainly true that we can’t all just be lazy and do nothing… but you don’t have to go put crazy pressure on yourself, overthink, care too much what other people think, or trying to be perfect all the damn time to be able to be happy.

Letting go of things in practice is not easy. But when you start doing it, you’ll realize that it actually IS that easy and simple. You literally don’t need anything to do it. You can do it anytime. Anywhere. With no props, no tools, nothing. You just need yourself.

It took me 5 years to find the meditation style that works for me

When I learned it, I have sought all over the world (literally) to learn it. In 2010, when I was depressed in Canada, one of the things I did was learning to meditate vipassana-style from a Buddhist monk. Since then, I’ve tried all sorts of different styles. In Japan, I went to a Zen temple. In San Francisco, I tried the Brahmakumaris style, mindfulness-based, Zen-style, yogic style.

I found all these styles require so much “effort”. You have to sit down for 30 minutes, super quiet, super still. In Zen meditation, you even have to sit super straight and can’t even slouch. It didn’t really vibe with me. Even though, I did find some form of peace of mind in the first 5 years of trying to find the right meditation style. Luckily for me, I did stick with it. That was important. To keep on doing it even when you’re bored or sleepy or you think it wasn’t doing anything.

When I moved back to Indonesia, in 2015, I finally found the one style of meditation that really works for me. It takes less than half the time (it can be done in 1–5 minutes), yet it’s highly effective. Even doing 5 minutes of this particular style can give you a much better impact (aka.. calm AF) than sitting 90 minutes in Vipassana or Zen style.

Super impactful, right? Doing this style of meditation for 5 minutes can turnaround a crappy day into an okay one. From being completely angry with someone to being calm AF.

What is this meditation #lifehack called?

This most effective meditation style for me is Open Heart Meditation. You can learn it for free by searching Open Heart Meditation by Irmansyah Effendi on Youtube or join free introductory sessions by Open Heart for Everyone community.

Or you can also take a few real-life workshops which I highly, highly recommend. Meditation is really experiential, it doesn’t really do justice for me trying to explain all the theories or benefits here.

At work, we meditate together at least once a week in our weekly staff meeting. It helps to get everyone to a place of chill-ness and solve problems from that state of being.

I really hope you are at least curious enough to read more on meditation after you read this article. Google it or try a class in your own town/neighborhood. It doesn’t even have to be open heart-style. It could be any style. Just at least try something. Try learning it from YouTube. Whatever meditation style that is.

Oh, and be-tee-dubs (BTW), I am not being paid by any organization to spread this message. I just want to share this with everyone because I really do believe that this is the most important skill I’ve learned in life. It has helped me in building my company and in learning to deal with any situation.

Meditation is the gift that keeps on giving. It’s the least that you can do for yourself. Give yourself that gift.

Written by:
Farina J Situmorang
Managing Partner at Catalyst Strategy
Jakarta, Indonesia

Instagram : @farinasitumorang